Never Having to Say No

“You really need to learn to say ‘no’!” Whether someone has given you this advice or you’ve given it to someone else, we all know that mantra….someone, somewhere is surely saying this right now! Yet, what if we never had to say no?

A Career Killer in Two Letters

When people say they’ve learned to say ‘no,’ they often say it proudly, like they’re expecting a gold medal from the Negativity Club. Understandably, these people are probably fed up with being taken advantage of. They feel over-stressed and underappreciated. But ‘no’ really isn’t your friend. In fact, it can hurt you, especially in your career. Even if your career doesn’t fall under the official category of “customer service,” it’s important to realize that we are all in the customer service business. Shouldn’t we avoid saying ‘no’ to the customer at all costs? In IT jobs, healthcare jobs, administrative jobs, or financial jobs we all have customers. Sometimes those customers are other employees or departments within the same company. If your department serves the needs of another department, saying ‘no’ is just like losing a sale. In order to achieve success in your career you need to start finding ways to say ‘yes.’

Five Ways to Say ‘Yes’

• THINK: All too often a ‘no’ comes from not thinking. It’s easy to have a knee-jerk reaction of “can’t be done” but what about stopping to think of how it can be done. Answers don’t always have to come in an instant. Rather than immediately answering ‘no’ what about saying, “Let’s see if there’s a way that can be accomplished.” Solutions often take time and effort and aren’t you in your career to provide solutions?
• INCLUDE OTHERS: People often view ‘yes’ as having to take total ownership. Just because you say ‘yes’ to a request doesn’t mean you have to undertake an entire project or be the only one responsible for the solution. Instead, you can compromise by including the requester in the work. It’s not only better than ‘no’ but you automatically form a team between you and those needing the solution. A possible statement can be, “I can do that, but I’m going to need XY and Z from you (or your department).”
• INFORM: Good communication techniques can stop you from saying ‘no.’ Rather than saying something can’t be done, present the situation with its possible outcomes. You may be able to get the requester to understand the obstacles you face. Often you can accommodate the request by changing the final expectation. Have you ever been set on having something only to find out that it really won’t suit your needs? You may be disappointed, but at the same time you’re relieved that you avoided a bad and costly decision. Become a map to better solutions rather than an abrupt dead end.
• OFFER PERSPECTIVE: Even if you vehemently disagree with the direction someone would like you to take, rather than refusing to listen, you can try to understand where they are coming from. Tell them that you understand why they want to go in that direction, but offer your own viewpoint in this way: “Yes, I understand where you are coming from, but can you see it this way…..”
• CONSIDER WHAT YOU CAN DO: Sometimes there is just no way to accommodate what someone else wants. So, tell them what you can do. “I’m sorry, but due to the amount of work required for this project and the limited resources in our department, we’re not going to be able to solve this by tomorrow. What we can do by then is this….”

Success with Yes

With ‘yes’ you can achieve solutions. ‘Yes’ means progress. The more you use ‘yes’ and the less you use ‘no’ in your career the more successful you will be. Start trying it today and see the difference it makes in your relationships, your career, and even your own attitude. Tell the Negativity Club they can keep their medals!

Lynn Mattoon is a Content Editor/Career Writer for TechCareers.com and other Beyond.com career communities. For relevant career and education information, you can follow her on Twitter at BeyondCareers.

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